Her Diamonds
by Somoene.Like.Me
Summary: "I don't know what I'm suppose to do, but if she feels bad then I do too." He watches her even after death, but this time he can't be the one ti wipe away her tears. Songfic-Her Diamonds by Rob Thomas.


**Disclaimer: I don't own this song or anything else for that matter but the plot and the laptop I'm writing this on.**

**Charles Beckendorf**

_By the light of the moon she rubs her eyes_

_Says it's funny how the night can make you blind_

_I can just imagine_

It shouldn't be like this, I think as I watch her sit up in her bed and look around as if searching for something before looking down, disappointed. I trY to reach out to her broken figure, to take her in my arms and tell her it would all be okay, but she was just out of my reach, as usual nowadays.

_And I don't know what I'm supposed to do_

_But if she feels bad than I do too_

_So I let her be_

I realize then that I would never again be able to hold her until she joined me down here in Elysium. Which I sincerely hope will be a long time from now. No matter how much I did wish she was here with me for eternity, I want her to live. To move on and live her life like she's supposed to. So I put my arms down, trying to ignore the ache for her, and just watch as she stands up quietly so as not to wake her siblings. She moves slowly towards the open window where the white silk curtains blow in the gentle breeze and the luminescent moonlight shines brightly down on her. She stands, immobile, for a moment before her bottom lip quivers and a lone tear trickles down her cheek. And that's when I feel it, her pain added to mine, and I wince.

_And she says ooh, I can't take no more_

_Her tears like diamonds on the floor_

_And her diamonds bring me down_

_Cause I can't help her now_

"Charlie…." She whispers brokenly and I feel my un-beating heart break into a million small pieces.

More tears roll down her face as she tries to hold back sobs.

_She's down in it_

_She tried her best but now she can't win _

_It's hard, to see them on the ground_

_Her diamonds falling down, way down_

I stand still, watching helplessly as she cries and the pain is nearly physical now, the pain of watching this beautiful girl cry her heart out. She shouldn't be like this. She should be smiling, laughing and twirling her hair around her finger. She should be happy, like she was when we were together for that short time. I'd give anything to see that familiar smile light up her face instead of this saddened frown that had vacated her expression.

Each one of those crystal tears that drop from her chin are like a slap in the face, a stab to my heart. And to say it hurt would be an understatement.

But what really hurt is the fact that I can't do anything about it.

_By the light of the moon, she rubs her eyes_

_Sits down on the bed and starts to cry_

_And there's something less about her_

"Why did you have to leave me?" She says suddenly and I jump. "You said you never would….you promised me you'd come back….you….you…."She chokes up as a sob tears it's way through her throat.

I flinch at her words and hate myself for doing this to her.

_I don't know what I'm suppose to do_

_So I sit down and cry too_

_But I don't let her see_

She moves back over to her bed and sits down, pulling her knees up to her chest. She puts her head down, hiding her face from my view, and cries, her body shaking softly as she sobs quietly.

"Silena." I say softly. "Silena….Silena!" I was yelling now but I knew she couldn't hear me, I just didn't know what to do. Seeing her like this was breaking me from the inside out. I wanted to just slump to the floor and cry with her at this moment.

_She shuts out the night_

_Tries to close her eyes_

_If she can find daylight_

_Then she'll be okay, she'll be okay_

_Just not tonight_

She looks up again, slowly lifting her tear stained face from her arms. She mumbles something incoherent as her brow scrunches together and she bites her lip like she does when she feels guilty about something. What did she have to be quilty for?

"…..my fault, Charlie…..it's all my fault …..that you're gone….I'm so sorry….."She sniffles as she wipes away a few tears with the back of her hand.

"What?" I ask aloud, confused and horrified that she was blaming herself for my death, but I couldn't wipe away her tears and reassure her that nothing was her fault at all.

_I can't take no more_

She lays back down, her head falling softly against the pillow but she doesn't look anywhere near sleep. She closes her eyes though and murmurs incoherent words to herself. I reach my hand out once more absentmindedly almost as if to touch her, but then remembered that I couldn't no matter how bad I wanted to.

_Diamonds the floor_

After what could have been hours or minutes, she falls into a peaceful slumber and I sigh. The ache for her is overwhelming and it takes all I have not to reach out to her again.

_No more, no more, no more_

I watch her for a seemingly endless amount of time, all the while thinking of memories we had made in the short year we had together. The nostalgia takes me over and I smile a hollow smile as I remember everything from the moment I asked her to the fireworks to the moment my life ended. I remember the feeling of her hand in mine. The feeling of her warmth next to me. The feeling of her intense blue gaze focused on me. The feeling of both of our beating hearts next to each other. But that was no more.

_Diamonds falling down_

But even if we would never be able to be together as two full living half bloods again, I would still love her from down here, I think as one last stray tear falls down her peaceful face. One last diamond rolling down my Silenas beautiful face.

_I can't take no more_

_Diamonds on the floor_

_No more, no more, no more_

_Diamonds falling down_

**Please review! (PS: Sorry if it's horribly cheesy or something)**


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